Yup, The Inbreeding is Showing: Stupid is as Stupid Does
Please don’t waste our time with your stupid attempts to demonstrate your stupidity.
You are a Freakasaurus and the Smalbany Blog reports on freakasaurs; we do not publish freakasaurian bullshit.[1]
This is what to look for. Sometimes that actually look and act almost human.
As our more intelligent readers can appreciate, being a pubic forum and allowing public comment we get all kinds of visitors. Add to that the fact that we publish our email so that it’s easier for readers and informants to contact us. As you might expect, there are plenty of freaks who will abuse any and all opportunities.
Smalbany deals only in verifiable facts. Sometimes we get them by simply requesting the information, other times we have to use the Freedom of Information Laws to get the information. We interview informants to make certain they are real people and that they have real information. Only then do we go ahead with our investigations and finally, we publish what we find.
But, as we mentioned above, there are plenty of freaks out there and we’d like to share just one example of one who tried to pass off what the freak thought would be bait. It failed miserably. But that’s not to say that we didn’t give the freakasaurus a chance to come through, as you’ll read below.
Note that in the interest of protecting the innocent, we have redacted any information that would have the potential of identifying the persons concerned. That is our standing policy until the facts are confirmed: at Smalbany, you are innocent until the facts indicate your guilt.
Here’s the original message from a freakasaurus calling him/herself “small[redacted]@gmail.com”:
“Someone from [redacted] and [redacted]’s inner circle is paying to have the criminal records of them published as new on the internet and she is going to make flyers that [redacted] and [redacted] are the publishers of this website. She is actively getting the DEC involved to pursuit prosecution and getting the ATF to get a search warrant and pursue prosecution. Just a heads up and GOOD LUCK!!! “
Freakasaurus actually expected us to bite at the bait. Instead we responded:
“Thank you very much for your tip; we appreciated hearing from you and would like to comment below.
“First of all, if you have information about a possible or a real conspiracy to harm Mr and Mrs [redacted], then you have a moral duty to inform them of your suspicions or of the facts you might have in that regard. We gather from your message that you are at least familiar with them and would know how to contact them with the information or “Heads up!” as you call it.
“To leave them vulnerable to some scoundrel without letting them know the facts is immoral; we hope you will take appropriate steps.
“Second, let me clarify one fact: Neither Mr or Mrs [redacted] have any connection whatsoever with this site. They certainly do not own or write for Smalbany nor to they contribute to any of the content. So let’s put that tidbit to rest now and for ever.
“Thirdly, the information you provide anonymously is too vague to be of any use to us. If you have names, we need names. If you have facts, we need those facts. If you are familiar with this site, and it would appear you are, you certainly know that we don’t just publish speculation or common gossip. We need names and facts, and we will do our own fact-finding and verification.
“If you are really interested in getting the word out about some local dumbass with an axe to grind, please share details with us that we can verify.
“You write that “[S]he is actively getting the DEC involved to pursuit prosecution and getting the ATF to get a search warrant and pursue prosecution,” so we at least can guess that the villain in this story is a woman. That’s a start.
“Please provide us with details, what “inner circle” is it that you are referring to, what “criminal records,” how would the DEC (Department of Environmental Conservation???) be involved in such a plot, and Why? the ATF? You obviously know more than you are sharing, and we would be grateful if you would share more.
“First things first: If you feel that this is a genuine conspiracy to harm the [redacted]s, you MUST inform them even if it has to be anonymously. We cannot do that for you unless we have more to go on.
“Thanks once again and we hope to hear back from you soon. Please note that we do not publish the names of informants and any information provided is subject to verification or editing. Apart from the facts and the names of the individuals plotting this alleged conspiracy, you will remain a confidential informant.”
We think that was a very decent response, don’t you? And we’ve given Freakasaurus several days to get back to us but s/he has not done so. We have to consider the “tip” to be bogus.
Given the fact that the New York State Department of Environmental Conservation (DEC) is probably one of the most corrupt departments in New York State government apart from the Executive Chambers (Office of the Governor) and the New York State Assembly and Senate, we wouldn’t wonder for a New York minute that the DEC could be involved in something so shadowy, so nefarious, so stupid as to get involved in a silly-ass conspiracy. But the ATF (Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms)?!?! Freakasaurus has a very vivid, if not pathological imagination.
ATF agents “protecting” us.
The ATF has to be as big a joke as the DEC!!! According to the ATF website,
“ATF is a law enforcement agency in the United States’ Department of Justice that protects our communities from violent criminals, criminal organizations, the illegal use and trafficking of firearms, the illegal use and storage of explosives, acts of arson and bombings, acts of terrorism, and the illegal diversion of alcohol and tobacco products.” [emphasis provided] [Source: https://www.atf.gov/, last accesed on July 22, 2019)
We have the Russian mafia in our front yards and the ATF is worried about “diversion of alcohol and tobacco products.”
Now that had to be one of the biggest jokes since Laurel and Hardy were dancing across the Silver Screen! So, the ATF is going to protect our communities “from violent criminals, criminal organizations, and illegal use and trafficking of firearms…and the illegal diversion of alcohol and tobacco products.” Well, that’s certainly what we all needed, another law enforcement agency to “protect” us. Yeah, they’re going to protect us from “criminals, criminal organizations…terrorism…and illegal diversion of alcohol and tobacco products,” while they’re building pot factories in our back yard that are very probably funded by the Russian mob and a Russian mobster!!! We have the Russian mafia in our front yards and the ATF is worried about “diversion of alcohol and tobacco products.” We have the Russian mafia in our back yards and the DEC is ignoring the contaminants and pollution being caused by Carver Companies and their dumping. You simply cannot make this stuff up, people! Either the DEC and the ATF have gone nutz or Freakasaurus thinks we all came down with the last shower. Maybe both.
Sgt Joe Friday and Officer Bill Gannon (Dragnet) rescue a Coeymans local from a DEC trap.
“How’d such shit-for-brains ever get beyond the evolutionary reject line?”
Given the amount of time and energy we spend getting information, responding to informants, following up on tips, and investigating, not to mention the writing and layout of the articles, we a justifiably pissed when some reptilian-brained freak wastes our reading time with such crap. But unfortunately this area is lousy with such remarkably stupid types that it would be hopeless to wish them to become extinct. The place would be a cemetery, a boneyard.
So, just look around yourself when you’re next in Shop’n Save, PriceChopper, a local yard sale, or even in one of our local churches and think to yourself, “How’d such shit-for-brains ever get beyond the evolutionary reject line?” But some did and they’re breeding locally.
[1] A freakasaurus is a freak of nature, a creature that did not have the good sense to go extinct 60 million years ago, and continues to walk the earth with only a primitive reptilian brain. They are caprophages (syn. scatophage, “shit-eaters”) and thrive in their local habitat. The only known habitats for the surviving mutant species are in the Albany County region — particularly in the city of Albany, Albany County Offices and state capitol offices —, Ravena-Coeymans-Selkirk region, and Northeastern corner of Greene County (Town of New Baltimore), while the brooding facility is maintained at the Ravena-Coeymans-Selkirk Central School District elementary, middle, and high schools.